I hate children, with their mucus-spilling faces, and their vacant, concussed-style questioning.
I’ve come up with a list of anaesthetic drugs we might be without, and some “alternatives” that might be considered.
I am at peace with never owning a house, but is it too much to ask that I could put up a poster?
Our cultural emotional capacity is synonymous with Olivia Colman’s ‘nervous raspberry’.
What didn’t I ask to see beamed into my eyeballs? A close-up of Davidson’s tongue entering Beckinsale’s mouth.
Make your life look like a perfect dream. Even if it is a living hell!
Your first job is a hotbed of opportunities to feel like an inadequate, under-qualified phoney.
Bolt the front door, draw the curtains and get peeping at these hot tips that’ll turn you into a keyboard Casanova.
Sharing a bedroom wall with your mum is a great excuse to give up on faking orgasms.
In the early days of adulthood, it’s both wise and entertaining to quadruple your life experience by sharing your friends’ pains and successes.